


This Year's Crush

by Ink_Gypsy



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-14
Updated: 2010-01-14
Packaged: 2017-10-06 06:52:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ink_Gypsy/pseuds/Ink_Gypsy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hannah receives a telling e-mail from Elijah during his first weeks in New Zealand during principle Lord of the Rings filming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Year's Crush

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first LOTR fandom story I ever posted online back in 2003.

Hannah logs onto her computer and smiles when she hears the automated voice announce, "Welcome. You've Got Mail." Her smile widens when she sees the e-mail is from Elijah. She's been waiting for this e-mail. Not this one specifically, but one like it. Elijah has been writing joint e-mails weekly to Hannah and their mother since he got to New Zealand, but this is the first one he's sent to her alone, and she knows why. This is the e-mail in which she'll find out which of his Lord of the Rings co-stars her brother has developed a crush on. She knows Elijah would be appalled at her use of the word crush, but Hannah's is very familiar with crushes, having had many of her own. Every time Elijah makes a film, there's always one male co-star that he becomes intrigued with, one he can't stop talking about, one he wants to spend all his time with. Elijah can think of it any way he likes, but to Hannah, it's a crush.

Elijah has been developing crushes on his male co-stars since he was fourteen, though Hannah doubts her brother knows she's aware of it. He didn't purposely begin sharing his feelings with her about it until he was sixteen, at the same time he finally decided to tell her he was gay. This announcement about his sexuality had not come as any great surprise to Hannah, but she had pretended surprise for Elijah's benefit. She knew for a fact that at the time he told her he hadn't -- and still hasn't as far as she knows -- told their mother this news, so she felt she owed him the expected reaction. Elijah the actor, if not Elijah the brother, would enjoy the drama.

Hannah is especially anxious to find out which man will be this year's crush because she's seen their pictures, and knows this is the first time Elijah's had so many gorgeous men to choose from. She takes out the stack of candid cast photos Elijah took and sent home shortly after he arrived on location, so that once he reveals the name of the man, she can check out his photo and imagine Elijah looking at him, too.

She's sure it's going to be one of the other hobbits. Hannah's betting Elijah has chosen the one named Dominic. He has a dangerous look about him that she thinks will appeal to Elijah, but she knows it could also be Billy, the one Elijah calls the "little Scotch man." And then there's the elf, Orlando, who's as beautiful as her brother, although he's movie star handsome while Elijah's just…Lijah. Still, Hannah thinks "Orli" and Elijah would look stunning together. If Hannah was choosing for Elijah, it would be the exotic-looking American with the foreign-sounding name, Viggo. The first time she saw his photo, her toes practically curled.

Hannah's so caught up in her speculations that she realizes she hasn't even read Elijah's e-mail yet, so she puts the photos aside and opens it. Sure enough, Elijah has made his choice, but the name surprises her. Sean. She sorts through the stack of photos until she comes across the one she wants. He's around the same age as Viggo, but doesn't look quite as brooding. He's playing Boromir, she remembers. She shouldn't be surprised. Elijah's always been attracted to older men, and it could be worse. Her brother could have decided he's in love with the wizard, Ian. He's the only openly gay actor in the film, which would make things a lot easier, but since Ian's old enough to be Elijah's grandfather, Hannah is glad he's not the one.

Hannah hits the reply button and types back: Have a ball bro!, already looking forward to all the e-mails she'll be receiving in the coming months. Most of Elijah's shoots only last a few months, but since he'll be filming in New Zealand for a year and a half, she knows she'll be getting lots of letters filled with her brother's thoughts about Sean. Bean's a funny name, she thinks, and wonders if that's part of what attracted Elijah to him. Oh well, there will be plenty of time to ask him about it later, but right now, Hannah is working on a crush of her own. She logs off so she can get ready for her date.

Elijah's next e-mail arrives three weeks later. As Hannah expected, all he can talk about is Sean. Just about every other word is the man's name. Lijah's really got it bad this time. He talks about how nice is it to have someone from home to talk to, how ironic it is that he had to go halfway around the world to meet him when Sean lives only a few miles away from the Wood home. This confuses Hannah a bit because she knows Sean Bean is English, but that doesn't mean he can't be living in California now. Then Elijah says how lucky he is that so many of his scenes will be just him and Sean while they shoot the journey with Gollum. How incredible it will be to get to spend so much time alone with him.

Now Hannah is really confused. She knows the Gollum scenes aren't with Sean Bean, they're with....Sean Astin. She realizes she's made a mistake, but then it was a logical assumption that Elijah was talking about Sean Bean. Hannah had loved Sean Astin in _Goonies_ \-- she still watches the movie whenever it's on television -- but he was much younger then. He's not that old now, younger than Billy, in fact, but in the photo Elijah sent her, he wasn't very attractive. She delves into the stack of photos again and picks up the one of Astin. Sure enough, he's put on a lot of weight, looks positively paunchy, so Hannah hadn't given him a second thought. Could Elijah really mean he's interested in this Sean? Hannah suddenly remembers something. She's saved all of Elijah's e-mails from New Zealand, so she pulls up the first one and finds the passage she wants:

>   
> **I know I told you I was all right with this trip because I didn't want either of you to worry about me, but the truth is, I was terrified when I got off the plane, so much so that I wanted to get right back on and come home again. I knew I couldn't, but I wasn't sure I was going to be able to handle it, being so far away from home and not knowing anyone. Fran Walsh seemed to know exactly how I was feeling. The first night in Wellington, we all went out to dinner, and she sat me next to Sean Astin. I guess she thought it might make me feel less homesick sitting next to the only other American. Well it worked. Sitting and talking with Sean, all my worries disappeared and I knew everything was going to be all right. I feel like I've known him my whole life.**   
> 

Hannah hadn't thought much about the story at the time. She just remembers being glad that Elijah had someone from home to talk to. What Elijah said about the dinner party also jogs another memory for Hannah, something Elijah told her about Sean Astin. He's married. And has a young daughter.

This is probably the most important shoot Elijah has ever been on. After all, it's the first one where Elijah hasn't been underage, and more importantly, the first one where Mom won't be there on set watching his every move. Elijah's never acted on any of his crushes before, but her brother's eighteen now, and there's nothing to stop him from starting a relationship with a man if that's what he wants. Hannah wonders if this will be the year Elijah's crush finally goes beyond the fantasy stage. She wants him to start enjoying himself and have a real life, but it never occurred to her that he would choose a straight man to do it with. Not only a straight man, but married. And some little girl's father.

Hannah's first instinct is to answer the letter with a warning, to tell Elijah that maybe he should stop and think before things go any further, but then she rereads the new e-mail again, imagining Elijah's face as he pours out his heart. She pictures him starting off with a burst of speed, then stopping to think. She watches in her mind's eye as his hands leave the keyboard, sees him stick a finger into his mouth and chew on a ragged nail as he gathers his thoughts. Certain passages leap out at her now, and she can't remember the last time Elijah sounded so excited. Or so happy.

>   
> **Sean's the kindest, most gentle man I've ever known, and he's always looking out for me. I locked myself out of my house the first week here, and Sean found a locksmith and took care of everything for me. Can you believe it, Hannah? I didn't have to do a thing. It's like having a big brother here with me.**   
> 

>   
> **It's winter here now. Sometimes there are long breaks between takes, and when we're up on the mountain, there's nowhere to sit except the ground, which is fucking freezing. Sean always makes sure I stay warm. He says he's got warmth to spare because of all his extra Sam weight, so he lets me sit between his legs with my back up against his chest and he puts his arms around me. It feels so good being held like that, and we stay that way until it's time to start filming again. Sean's so considerate and giving, Hannah, always worrying about everyone else's comfort.**   
> 

>   
> **I got drunk for the first time last week. All the other guys thought it was really funny, but Sean was worried that I'd overdone it so he drove me home. Halfway there I got sick all over his car, but Sean didn't get mad, just pulled over and held my head while I threw up. When we got back to my place he cleaned me up, then tucked me into bed and stayed with me until I fell asleep. I feel so safe when he's around.**   
> 

>   
> **Sean and I have become really close, Hannah. We spend a lot of time together when we're not working. I've showed him how to use the Playstation, and made him listen to some of my CD's. He's not very good at the games, and I know he doesn't like my music, but he plays Monkey Island and listens to the CD's anyway, just to please me. Even if we're just hanging out, there's no place I'd rather be. And no one I'd rather be with.**   
> 

Hannah doesn't answer the e-mail right away. She wants to think about it before she responds because she knows now that she was wrong to dismiss Sean Astin just because of his weight. As she reads his words, Hannah sees that Elijah, as usual, has looked past the physical and found what's really important, unlike Hannah, whose potential dates have to score very high on the looks meter. Just from what Elijah's told her, Hannah can tell that Sean Astin is a good man. What's really obvious to her is how much her brother likes him, really likes him. She's never heard Elijah talk about anyone the way he talks about Sean. Before it was always about how much fun he had with someone, never how they made him feel, or more importantly, how he felt about them. It's almost as if--

The realization hits Hannah so suddenly she's taken completely by surprise. She can't believe she didn't see it sooner, considering it's been right in front of her the whole time. All she had to do was read between the lines. Of course she'd like it better if Sean wasn't married, but it's like Mom always says, sometimes life leads, and all you can do is follow. So Elijah is finally breaking out of his shell, but not the way she and their mother thought he would. At first Hannah wasn't sure how she felt, but now she's decided she's happy about it, even a little giddy with excitement at the thought. Hannah had expected Elijah to develop yet another crush, but instead something else has happened. Something totally unexpected. Something wonderful.

Elijah has fallen in love.


End file.
